Dangerous Liasons
by squarecreatures
Summary: Stefan and Elena porch scene from 3*14 that breaks my heart, here's what i WISH happened!


I let him throw my hands down and watched his back as he walked away from me, that familiar ache was tumbling through my heart, it reminded me of how stupid I was to believe maybe this one time I could get what I really wanted. I stood there, knee's shaking, breath trembling and heart racing for the man I had touched for only a tiny moment in time, and I wondered how I still wanted him so much, how I still wanted to fight for him, I tried to think of any reason why I shouldn't.

I held back the heavy tears threading from behind my lashes, and to forget that the last time I held him so close was to tell him I wouldn't love a ghost forever. Maybe I would though. Because tonight, I never felt so much for him with so little, never wanted something so much when everything that could possibly be wrong is. I sighed feeling like I was carrying him on my shoulders, or something to the equivalent and it was that way because I wanted to. I wanted to help him, because I loved him, even if he had nothing to offer me for the rest of my life, I would still love him because of what he had given me in the past.

The light on the porch turned off, and I realised I was still standing outside where he had left me, where I had once left him. The same place where I had cried behind my door because of what he was, and he had stayed for me despite everything I had done to push him away. Not now though, I wouldn't let him push me away, no matter how much it hurt, I know, I just know he's still in there.

I turned slightly to trigger the sensor of the porch light, and when it turned on again it blinded me, but I still felt numb even when my pupils struggled with the change of light and forced my eyelids closed, I felt a tear fall down my cheek. And with a heavy breath I opened them again, and I saw Stefan, standing at the end of my steps, with his hands in his pockets and his mouth perched open slightly, staring at me. I let out an uneasy breath that matched the pattern of my heart beat, and walked towards him staying on the second last step so our faces remained in line. And my hands rose to where they had just been a few moments ago, but this time without the desperation that was there before, I didn't grip his hair to keep him in place, I didn't force his eye's to meet mine like I had tried before.

Instead I let my nimble fingers run through his soft hair and studied his face as he fixed his eyes to mine, my thumbs smoothened out the lines near his eyebrows and I wondered how long they had been like that, after Klaus had set him free. I longed to see him smile again, to be free again. Although my body language in that moment was confident and sure, inside I still felt anxious and vulnerable, because he was the only person who could really hurt me. He could reject me, call me every name under the sun, compel me or bite me and I would still find a reason to love him and that's so scary it makes me want to scream.

My thumbs continued to smoothen his brows ,I let my fingers run down his cheeks and I held his jaw to tilt his face to mine, I licked my lips and placed a short chaste kiss on his, I tried my hardest not to deepen it. But with Stefan, that's all I knew ,I had to pry myself away even when he leaned in to return to me. My breath had quickened and my hands on his face shook as our heads twisted but left our lips inches apart. I couldn't see his face, but I didn't need to, to know that he felt something.

"Do you feel pain now?" I asked him sincerely, because I didn't know before. I didn't think that when he let himself feel anything other than the numbness that had phantomed his body and dictated his emotions, caused him pain. Pain I knew could destroy him if he let it.

"No" he whispered beside my lips, and the cool air made the moisture on them tingle as they stayed parted next to his, so close I could kiss him again, but didn't know if I should. Just before I could think of another reason not to take his lips again, he did. He missed slightly, capturing the corner of my mouth, and I thought maybe he meant to kiss my cheek, but not now, as his tongue found mine and he teased and swirled around my mouth.

I kissed him back, hard. I gripped the back of his neck and encouraged him to bruise my lips, to bring his tongue deeper, because I had wanted this for so long. I couldn't think of every night I had missed him and cried, no. I couldn't think of the first time I had seen him in 3 months and he walked away, I just couldn't. I forced myself to forget the last time he said he loved me or kissed me this way, how he betrayed everything we said would never happen to us, because I wanted him all of those times too. I wanted him at his worst just as much as I wanted him at his best and it made those tears that I held back this entire time stream down my face, and still I wanted more.

I turned my head and opened my mouth again for him, raising my shoulder as his hands gripped my hips and lifted me through the open doors of my house and I wanted him to. The dress was stopping me from straddling him and I moaned in his mouth when he pressed my hips to his. He backed us up to the hall table where I sat to pull my skirt up and he pulled away to meet my eyes. We were both breathing so hard and I forgot how we got here, on this table practically drooling over each other, this wasn't really us, but I didn't care. I didn't know how people got back together; I was just running on instinct.

"Elena" he whispered a tortured breath, moving to the crook of my neck. I knew he couldn't look at me now. And I held him as his breathing returned to normal, needing it too, his embrace, his love and his care, I needed it all.

"I'm not in control" he nearly sobbed on my shoulder, it sounded like he nearly cursed what he was and it made me so sad. I held him, not knowing what else to do, he let his weight fall on my body and it was like a breath of fresh air how he was leaning on me, needing me beside him.

"You won't hurt me" I said to him, dragging my nails through his hair, god I missed his hair. He raised his head to meet my eyes again, this all felt normal even though it shouldn't. "How can you say that when I bit you, when...the bridge", he couldn't finish, I didn't want him to, and I wanted to forget about that night forever.

"Because it wasn't you Stefan, after everything we've been through how could I ever stop loving you? Feeling like this with you?" I looked between us and he did too, how we hadn't moved an inch, how my legs still straddled him and his hands still gripped me like a vice. His desire obvious as he stared between us.

Stefan let his hand fall from his grip on my neck and trailed a finger passed my collar bone and over the ridge of my breasts. I shivered, as I watched him, his face softening again was all I needed to know he was here with me, and he could see me again. Any doubt that his body was still possessed by the thirsty, angry, spiteful Stefan had faded away, and all I wanted to do was hold him because I hadn't seen him like this in so long.

I bit my lip, almost on purpose and his eyes widened, his eyes wandered to my lips and hesitated before leaning in to suck on my bruised lip. He growled in my mouth as I pulled away from the gentle grip of his teeth. He ran his fingers up and down my thighs and I couldn't breathe, it had been so long since he had been there. His skilled fingers trailed lightly up and down ,nearer to my panties every time until his fingers grazed the fabric. There was so much sexual tension between us you could cut it with a knife, I didn't know how much he thought about me when he was gone, if he even thought about me at all, but I didn't expect anything less from him. Before he left with Klaus, days would have been torture for us.

"I love you so much" he mumbled almost incoherently, his face hardening again, and I could feel him telling himself not to do this, not to love me, to leave me again.

"Don't" I blurted out. "Please Stefan" and he whipped his head back to my eyes. "Elena" he pleaded, and tried to shift away, "how can you still love me?" he asked.

"Because I do Stefan" I gripped his cheeks hard, begging him to forgive himself, begging him to return to me. "I love you so much" he repeated, almost admitting it to himself and I could barely hear him.

He slowly kissed my cheek, my jaw, my ear and my mouth, he was cautious, like I was made of glass, holding me back with his hands on my waste as he pressed his lips to mine and tangled his fingers in my hair.

I couldn't hold it any longer; my desire mixed with months of wanting him and worrying and needing him helped me cross that line that held me back before we kissed. I reached for his belt buckle and he gasped in my mouth. "No" he whispered and faltered for a millisecond before capturing my lips again. Before I knew it he was lifting me and ascending the stairs towards my bedroom with his hands searching for the zip of my dress, my moans muffled against his neck as I sucked and kissed him.

"Stefan" I groaned and we fell on the bed, it was rough, tantalizing, raw and sexy as hell. I couldn't remember why this had been wrong before, why we couldn't have done this when he first came home. I was just so filled with emotions and heat that my mind was working on one instinct alone.

I worked on his shirt, after my dress hit the floor and Stefan settled himself between my legs, kissing and groping me like he couldn't help himself. "I needed you Elena" he dragged his tongue down my belly and to the band of my panties.

"Ah" I couldn't form a sentence; he blew cold air near my belly button as his hands pushed my panties down my hips.

He kissed my inner thigh, he kissed in between my leg and my hip bone and my body jerked when his mouth found my clit. I moaned again, grabbing his hair, encouraging it, I was so close already, so sensitive because of all the weeks without..._him_. And Stefan was kissing my cunt like he had just kissed me, hard. Tasting me.

"Ah" I couldn't stop, he was sucking my clit and I arched, pushing up against his mouth and let him fuck me with his tongue. His own moans of appreciation sent me over the edge as wave after wave of orgasm jerked me into overdrive. Stefan didn't stop though; he knew just how to extend those waves and made sure that I continued through every single one of my trembles as he inserted his fingers deep inside me. "Ohh god" was all I could manage as he finally wound me down and came back up to kiss me. I couldn't distinguish whether I had come multiple times or whether it was just the one orgasm he had teased out of me to perfection. I could taste myself, as his mouth possessed mine, and my heart raced.

"What do you do to me?" he whispered beside my ear as I pushed his half opened shirt off him and started on his pants.

"Stefan" I gasped as I stroked him and remembered, every other time we had been together like this, my heart raced again, my lip trembled as my post orgasm started to liquefy me into sweet relaxation, and I wanted him more now than I could ever remember I had ever before.

"I need you" my voice was horse, but I didn't care, it was true, I needed him so much, I needed _my _Stefan back.

He was naked now, and the only thing separating us was my bra and I removed it, never once taking my eyes off his. I saw something there, it was him, him bared to me like before as he watched me in awe. He knelt in between my legs, noticing the movement of my breathing and how ready we were for each other. It was so intimate, the only way I could ever be and was with him.

It had all slowed now; he covered my body with his and landed a soft kiss on my lips, sighing as I rubbed up against him. His penis touching me, so close, I squirmed to get him there. With his arms on either side of me, he pressed near my entry and guided himself inside slowly, looking in my eyes and I groaned because he felt so euphoric and it was just too intense. We were too intense.

"You feel amazing" my voice shook, and his breath hitched as he slowly pushed inside me.

"Am I hurting you?" he asked and I shook my head, had it really been that long that he needed to ask me that?

"Elena you're so tight " he moaned near my neck, hearing him talk like that made me shiver. I rocked my hips in response and he moaned again. Hearing his noises made me so hot, I wanted it harder, faster and I gasped while we continued to rock together slowly. Savouring every single second of us together. Stefan reached down and held his thumb over my clit.

"Stefan god", I grasped his hair and closed my eyes, he circled my clit harder and I could feel my climax rising again. "Lena..." he stumbled for a second as his own pleasure started to rise.

"Oh. God Elena!-"and he was pounding into me now, I was coming again, and it was ecstasy, I could almost see stars, and the fact that Stefan was coming too made it that much better as he called my name ,growled in my ear as my body tensed and my head jerked back as he pounded me in that sweet spot, over and over. And he collapsed in a heap next to me.

I couldn't stop myself from myself from holding him after, it was automatic, and he did too. It was nearly unsettling how we fell into our usual pattern after sex, he stroked my hair and slung my legs over his as I settled on his chest.

"I love you" he whispered and I drew circles on his chest, absorbing him. Somehow saying those words was all I needed to hear, and the rest would fall into place, it just had to. "I love you too Stefan".

**Please review :)**


End file.
